This is part of how I got similar desires as how cuckolds feel.
When I first arrived in England and started living with Mandy, my aunt, a few years back, Mandy had a carer coming in the daytime, to help with various things, as my aunt is elderly and disabled. Her carer, Jayde, was GORGEOUS...the best looking woman I personally think is possible;a jaunty little rock chick with long, luxurious hair, and eyes like dark pools, and the prettiest, most attractive face and figure you could ever find.
A few tattoos finished off her exotic little hippy-chick appearance. I got very close to her, with her encouragement; she made me feel good, and gave me the impression, [maybe falsely] that she fancied me. A lot of flirting went on, and she'd often take me into fetish-clothing shops or adult bookshops on our walks out together when Mandy was busy. Some people could have seen she was leading me on, but I was too flattered and enamoured to realise.
Being a guy with strong emotions and a highly sensual nature, I realised I was falling for her; but I could do nothing about it, as she was so closely involved with us. She suddenly stopped flirting with me, for no reason I ever discovered; and became much cooler; but by this time I was attached to her, and every meeting we had would put shudders of desire through me; and this situation began to hurt me, because she'd still be flirtatious with other blokes...workmen, people in Mandy's social circle, etc etc...Anyone, it seemed, except me. Dunno what I'd done to deserve these mind games. She'd even begun to watch my reaction as she flirted with other men, I could tell. Then she'd ask subtle things to suss me out afterward, I could tell, to see what effect it had had on me.
I soon also discovered she wasn't as genuine to me as she pretended, and the shock of discovering her slatings of me behind my back turned my world upside down. I was torn to bits by it; and it caused such intense emotional turmoil for me I went on antidepressants. Perhaps, I've since wondered, was she a habitual teaser and control freak, and somehow got off on the power of her situation relative to me? I dunno. But she never admitted anything to me...so she was a bone of contention to me for a couple of years afterward, and my memories of her cause even now starkly contrasted feelings of desire and deep lust, but also great anger, about the headgames that went on. I think, after the eventual argument her behaviour caused, we'll never speak again, maybe her arrogance is too strong to let her apologise and make up; BUT..there's still several hot sexual memories she's left me with, about her...and this is the first major incident that happened. If anyone out there has been in any similar strange and grotesque but somehow arousing situations in their life, I'd love to read of it, as I've become interested in the complexity of human relationships, and the mix of pain and pleasure that certain experiences can cause in people. Anyway, Mandy needed a new computer after a couple of months. So, Jayde got Jim in, a PC tech, [who worked with her company's computers, and was supposed to be good], to get one and set it up for her.
Me, Jayde and Mandy were playing scrabble in the lounge when Jim first turned up at Mandy's house, and he immediately started flirting with Jayde.. suggestive banter and innuendo, which she giggled at, wrinkling her nose like a schoolgirl. I tried to stop it unsettling me and making me wish I was Jim, getting Jayde's attention in that way.. but I couldn't help feeling jealous, which I hid as best I could. Maybe Jayde guessed and enjoyed that, I dunno.
It was the first time I saw her bare feet, too, stranglely enough, when Jim turned up. She slipped off her socks after she'd let Jim in, and as she padded around the carpets, getting things for him and showing him into the study, I saw they were gorgeous. My heart was lost to her totally, the moment I saw her shapely feet, with her toerings and ankleband - the most gorgeous little feet I've ever seen.
I dunno whether Jayde knew about my secret fetishes, but I knew she'd at least once looked at my websurfing history... and I visited mainly hotwife sites, wife-story sites and foot fetish sites. I dunno if she meant to be teasing me.. .but she was playing up to Jim, too, and flirting back to him, and letting us see her pattering up the loft-ladder in bare feet, and loudly giggling at his suggestive, dirty remarks to her, in front of me and Mandy.
When I brought Jim and Jayde some coffee in the study, Jim was sat working at the computer, showing her things on it ,etc; and she was knelt down by him, resting her arms up on the desk..and of course, Jim had a good eyeful of her firm cleavage in that position; he could see down her top! She pretended to be all businesslike and normal, but I knew what they were doing.. and I saw the worry on Mandy's face too. After a while, it was time for me and Mandy to go out for the afternoon. Jayde had arranged beforehand to stay with Jim and lock up the house when it was her clocking-off time. I and Mandy wouldn't be back until the evening; and it so irked me to leave her alone with Jim, who obviously would love to have his wicked way with her. But I had to go, Mandy expected me to.
However, when we got to the cinema, I couldn't relax, wondering what was going on back home. By chance, Mandy bumped into a friend of hers, and I was able to make a feeble excuse to leave them to chat, and go "for a drink" on my own, and see Mandy back home later. But I didn't go the pub, at all. I raced away and jumped in a cab, and told him to take me straight back home! I had to know. Even if I could just peep.
The curtains were all shut when I got home, and the house was dark, but the study light was on. I sneaked around the back, carefully put my key in the back kitchen door, and sloped into the kitchen. They were obviously still in the little study.. and creeping round the door into the hall, I saw the study door was slightly open, and light was streaming through, into the dark hall. And...voices. Jayde's voice, and Jim's voice. Jayde's voice was squeaking and sighing, and Jim's voice grunting. Oh, no..They weren't... DOING IT, were they? I had to see. My heart in my mouth, I crept up to the door, and peeped in, doing my best not to be seen or heard... And...THERE! There was the sight I'd been dreading! Jim was stood, facing the window, standing over that big, old photocopier of Mandy's; with his pants down, and his hairy arse pumping back and forth! And...Jayde's tight jeans and panties were draped on the chair at the desk; she'd took them off.
Plus.. even worse...Jayde's bare legs were clamped around Jim's waist, and her hands came round his back, stroking and clawing at his starched white shirt. Yes...Jim was FUCKING JAYDE!!
"Hoohh, Hooooh, Ohhhh!" she cried, and giggled as well, as he humped her. He'd sat Jayde on the photocopier and was fucking shagging her!! I shrank back, in utter shock, into the darkness, away to the kitchen, got some kitchen roll around my suddenly erect cock, and wanked desperately into it; hating Jim like anything, but I couldn't stop myself being unbearably aroused by the fact that beatiful, sexy, beloved Jayde was being a little tart; betraying me, betraying her hubby, and degrading herself by letting beardy, pervy old Jim between her legs! Right there in Mandy's house, where I lived! "So, That was the deal ,was it", I thought.
She wouldn't shag me, but she would shag a fucking sleazy perv like Jim?? It wasn't fair..Even though Mandy had said she wouldn't care if I did have a fling with her, Jayde still wouldn't treat me like she treated other men? It was sick, and I felt so hurt and angry, but it was so seedy and horny nevertheless, that I just had to try and accept it by enjoying my submissive position. So, I soon poured out my hot sperm into the tissue, while hearing Jim Shagging Jayde, and the noises they made echoing all round the bungalow!
"Hourgh, Ugh, Ourgh!"
Oh, WHY? Why did she do this, when she was married anyway, and I wanted her so badly? Did her hubby know, or care? Were they swingers, even? I didn't know, cause she wouldn't tell me.
Then, I hid in the bedroom, peeping out through the gap in the door, and waiting till they went; but they didn't go, yet; there was more. It was only half past three, and Jayde wasn't really due to go until five. They started laughing again, and I heard them talking. Jayde said, "I'll show you that C.D., just hang on, Jim, mate."
I saw Jayde come out, with her top rolled up, and the rest of her naked; and I felt a rush of intense desire, seeing her gorgeous body; her round, ripe little boobs with perfect nipples, and her dark triangle of pubes, and her horny little perky bum, like a peach, as she went in the lounge and got something from her bag; and went back to Jim in the study. Soon, Jim began saying, "Corr, what a top woman you are, Jayde! Those pics are getting me hard again!"
I had to sneak out again, and have a look. What was going on? Well, peeping in from the dark hall again, I now saw Jim was sat down at the computer again, with a great big erection. Oh, fuck, his dick must have been 9 inches long, which was even bigger than my own which I was always proud of...and Jayde was crouching next to him, clicking the mouse and showing him a load of pics from a C.D. of hers.
She was reaching with her free hand to caress his knob now and again, as she showed him the pics... "Oh, God"! I thought, when I glimpsed the pics on the screen. The first ones I glimpsed showed Jayde dressed as a schoolgirl, at some party she'd been to, and the revellers were all in fancy dress, messing about and doing silly things...but Jayde was having her BARE ARSE CANED! Yes..an old rocker dressed as a schoolmaster had her bent over, knickers down, and whacking his cane across her bare bottom!
I was shocked and stunned, but oddly excited. It was just so strange and dirty for me to see, I couldn't help feeling highly aroused. In other pics, some bulldyke of a woman, among other people too, were licking at Jayde's bared tits, or fondling her bottom. The guys were stripping her off, showing her tits to the camera, and in one pic, two guys were even pulling her bumcheeks apart,and one guy had a feather tickling her arsehole!
Jim said, "So, do you take it up there then, Jayde?" She giggled, and said..Well,I have sometimes...not really though." Jim said, Well, how about if I let Mandy have the computer for half price... If you give up your cute little Bottom for the rude desires of this Dirty Old Man??"
He slapped her bum, making Jayde yelp and say, "No, I couldn't!" But Jim wrestled her down, over his knee, and began smacking her bum, to make her agree! She was laughing, and yelping, as he held her down and really smacked her quivering bum hard, pausing to open it and look at her bumhole, before carrying on the spanking. Jayde's sexy bare feet waved and flexed in the air, as her bare ickle bum got smacked! "Ooohhh! Owwww!" she went!
I saw her fanny and arsehole, when he opened her bum... her creased, broad, dark starfish, which I'd always wanted to see...along with her half shaven, sweet pussy mound. They were on view, but not for me.....Bastards!
He was going, "You will, you WILL! You WILL give me your bum, Jayde, won't you?"- [SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!] WON'T YOU, JAYDE??"
Eventually, she gave in! "Yes! Yes, I'll do it!" she went, "You know I will! I just wanted to be spanked first! Hee hee hee!"
Suddenly, Jayde got up again, and positioned herself at the computer, with Jim sitting behind her. She put some lube or something on to his cock, letting her fingers reach back and tease his shaft as they applied the coating of whatever it was. Then, she bent forward, her arms reaching right back. She grabbed her buttocks, and spread them wide, wide open; then she slowly settled herself with her bumhole touching the end of Jim's dick!
"Corr, yes!" Jim exclaimed, "Up your arse, Jayde, come on!"
She began wiggling her bum, down onto his dick; and she giggled,"Hee-hee-hee!" as his big purple knob end just plumped inside her twitching brown bumhole! POP!
"Oh, no, Ohhh, no..", I thought, feeling sick but grabbing my crotch again in jealous excitement, as Jim sat there grinning and introducing his big veiny prick up the arse of the woman I adored! My heart was almost breaking to see this, but my cock throbbed so hard! She soon had his shaft almost completely up her bum, and they began a slow, lewd movement, Jim sitting in the chair and Jayde crouching over him, slowly moving herself up and down.
You could see her bumhole being dragged slowly up his shaft when she began the upstrokes...and she carried on showing him the pics of the kinky things she'd done with others at wild parties etc, as he bummed her. How horrible it was for me, to see sweet, kind, caring Jayde, laughing as she took Jim's big horrible dick RIGHT UP HER SHITTER!
She giggled and encouraged Jim, as he enjoyed her arse and ogled the dirty pics of her....His dick throbbed there like a nasty monster, and Jayde paying homage to his massive cock with her sweet ickle bum. Whenever a particularly rude pic came onscreen, Jim's cock would twitch, and the veins would show prominently for a sec, before Jayde crouched again, engulfing his manhood in her gorgeous, sacred shithole!
He was going "Woarrgh, yehh! I knew I'd get you and your bum one day, Jayde!" and his hands roved over her body, often squeezing and pulling her tits, or spreading her arse to watch his own dick invading her bum, so adulterously and eagerly!
The pics were shocking. Some showed Jayde indulging in BDSM with people, tied to bondage frames and whipped, and nipple clamps and everything. Another set showed her being gangbanged, really romped hard around a room by a group of guys, and spunked all over etc. The photos at the end of this set, showing her face in the centre of a circle of cocks, are still clear in my memory today.
Still more showed her in lesbian spanking games with a gang of women, using canes, whips, belts and paddles, and all kinds of sex toys on each other. I didn't see all the pics as I was hiding, but I'd have loved to.
He sat there, legs spread and Jayde between them, moving up and down and grinding her bum onto his crotch. He started fucking smacking her bum, very hard but slowly and lazily, and asking questions about the pics as he bummed her. She began breathing heavier, her face blushing as she answered his embarrassing questions.
She was reaching down and rubbing herself off. He was calling her naughty things as he enjoyed her sweet arse. It seemed, going by what they were saying, that she had agreed to willingly prostitute herself in secret to somebody she was involved with financially, though I couldn't work out who, whether it was someone high up where she worked or elsewhere.
These sexual exploits were arranged linked to that somehow. She had a secret life as some sort of sex slave, and got off on the pain and humiliation she put herself through! It was disturbing me but somehow really turning me on.
I had to back away for a minute, to compose myself and try and stay quiet. When I looked again, I was just in time, to see Jim orgasm! He growled, "Corrr, Okay, Dirty Jayde, I'm just about to fill up your bottom!!"
Jayde went "Oohhh!" in glee, and looked at him over her shoulder, bucking her bum slightly up and down, and encouraged him, sticking her little witchy chin out and flashing her sexy eyes, saying "Ourgh, go on then, Do it Up My Arse!...Bloody Lovely, Mate!"
And he did. Jim growled again, and his shaft pulsated, embedded right up Jayde's bum... and Jayde's sexy toes curled in pleasure on the study carpet! Big dirty Jim was shooting out all his lust deep up her chocolate starfish, and Jayde actually encouraged this dirty old man to do it to her!!
She smiled back at him, squeezing her bum tight on his dick, and she lustily said "Oooohhh, JAYDE RIDES AGAIN AND JAYDE'S ADDICTED!!!"
She slowly gyrated her arse around, milking out all his hot load into her bum, and his cock pulsed and throbbed, spurting it all up Jayde's bum!!
At that, I just had to go, and slipped out into the dark garden outside again, and frantically wanked myself off in both misery and sexual ecstasy!
Soon,the bathroom light went on ,and I heard them in the shower, with Jayde still giggling as Jim did whatever other dirty things he did to her!!!
I went the local pub,and calmed myself with a stiff drink [or five!] and only returned when they'd gone, after six o'clock.
Of course I couldn't tell Mandy what I'd seen; and she'd never believe me anyway. Things became strangely normal again...and Jayde always pretended nothing had happened,and played the sweet, respectable married carer ever after...at least until the next time I saw her "Being Naughty"!
FUCK MY WIFE!
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